Air travel is a lot like checking into a hospital. It reduces one to a state of helplessness and our basest needs and emotions.
Like the hospital, the airline has us under its control as soon as we check in. We hand over our rights and dignity and accept conditions we would normally rail about. They can limit our personal baggage, how many outfits we will be wearing over the next few hours or days, promote the invasion of our physical space by assigning us to a narrow space with strangers on either elbow and pressing their knees into our backs. We are subjected to incarceration in a large but cramped capsule for as long as the airline and crew deem necessary. The top guy can order us to be strapped down.
If the temperature is uncomfortable we have little options or control. We can sweat and moan quietly if it's too hot, or we can whine for a scrap of a blanket if it's too cold. They control when and what we eat, and they even interrupt our sleep-if we can manage any- to see if we want anything.
On a recent four hour flight we were served sips of liquid sustenance in tiny cups filled with ice and tossed small bags of pretzels. It reminded me of the little cups of juice that accompany bland, starchy hospital meals.
However, DH and I did find a source of comfort on this flight, but we may have detracted from the experience for those immediately around us. We listened to comedy on the "complimentary satellite radio".
I don't know if it was because we were hopped up on ginger ale, pretzels, and high altitude, but we both got really hysterical while listening to Seinfeld, followed by Jeff Foxworthy - an interesting lineup. DH got carried away first and started that crying kind of laughter. He was trying to muffle it and just teared up all the more. This got me going, but thankfully I was in the window seat and could giggle and choke into the corner. Finally, I tossed my jacket over DH's head to shield his contorted hysterical face from other passengers who were starting to turn and look.
Whew! I miss the old days when we all had to watch the same mediocre movies together. At least we could commiserate as a plane-trapped community.
DH and I finally got some self-control back. And while the plane slowly taxied up to the airport after the flight, and the temperature rose to an uncomfortable level, a flight attendant announced for all passengers to "please lower your window shade to keep the cabin cool and comfortable for the next flight".
Ha! Maybe some A/C or a new compressor would be more effective?
And next time, I'll remember that Dramamine, airplane snacks, and Seinfeld are a dangerous cocktail.
Disclaimer: The above is my not so humble opinion and personal experience and is not intended to reflect the subjective experience of other airline passengers. It is also meant to be mildly entertaining and not necessarily wholly factual. I understand that the airline industry provides us with a very valuable service and has a tremendous responsibility to the public. I realize that the cost cutting efforts that airlines employ are in order to keep air travel affordable.
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