Less than two weeks ago I graduated from Jeff Justice's Comedy Workshoppe and performed my first stand up routine at The Punchline comedy club. There was a sold out crowd of friends and relatives of the 17 people "graduating" that night. We each got about 5 minutes to do our new thing on stage in the hot lights. It was phenomenal fun to be in front of a supportive audience and to make them laugh. It even sounded like real laughter. I thought I was funny for a few minutes there; but I did check behind me to see if there was somebody back there making faces or pulling his pants down.
Then I entered a comedy contest at another club out of town. Now, I want to point out that the info they sent about the contest said, "The more clever and clean you are, the more likely you are to advance."
I think this was a joke from the club owner. I was gullible enough to believe it; either that, or my definition of clean is a h*ll of a lot squeakier than anyone else's. I went in with just under seven minutes of well rehearsed comedy - or "jokes" as I call them.
After the first contestant, I knew I could be in trouble. By the time the fourth came off and I was next, I was practically in a panic. I realized that after hearing four people doing sex and masturbation jokes, and using the "f word" freely - the audience was going to be numb to my "clean" jokes. And I guess I was right. I say "guess" because the audience barely got a chance to decide. I know I sound like sour grapes, but I can't help but wonder if the crowd would have warmed up to me a bit if I had been allowed to get through my set; but I wasn't.
There were three so-called celebrity judges who were mainly there to give critiques to each contestant after each performance. One of the judges had a high hat cymbal to use as a gong. He gonged me barely three minutes into my set. I was pretty miffed that I didn't get a better chance. Admittedly, I started weak because I was so psyched out by all the "dirty" comedy before me. So I faltered a bit. It's also possible that they took my opening little joke as bragging. I said, "Well, I'm not a guy, ethnic, Jewish, bitterly divorced or a lesbian; so I guess my chance of making it in stand up comedy is thhhffft*!"
*(Made a 'raspberry" sound and a zero gesture.)
I guess there were more lesbians and bitter divorcees in the crowd than I expected.
I did get some laughs after that, but not enough for the judge with the cymbal apparently. Anyway, I survived my first bombing and I am still alive. I am questioning whether a straight, happily married white girl can make it on that scene. I also have been asking myself how edgy am I willing and able to be. Frankly, I think just about anybody can come up with a dirty joke. Being funny without being shocking or gross is a bigger challenge. I believe I would like to continue to tackle that bigger challenge.
That's all I have to say about that for now.
Random attempts at humor writing by a lefty.
Showing posts with label stand up comedy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stand up comedy. Show all posts
5/03/2010
Top 10 list: To a "stand up" guy
Top ten reasons you can only come up with "dirty" jokes:
10. You spend a lot of your time talking to sex addicts and heavy masturbators.
9. You try to come up with your material while playing "guitar" for def chics.
8. You still think you are a participant in trials for Cialis.
7. You haven't figured out that you should schedule your late night gigs telling jokes to winos during your wife's "special time of the month" and GO HOME with wine on the other nights!
6. Dirty jokes suit the quality of audience in the clubs that will give you mic time.
5. When you said you really wanted to come up with a set you could do in front of your kids - you were LYING!
4. Your mother was an empathic and "generous" woman. (That's right, yo' mama!)
3. Your braille underwear is too tight.
2. You think: "If it was funny in middle school, it's funnier now."
Number 1 reason you can only come up with "dirty" jokes:
..................................................................................................
YOU ARE BASICALLY JUST A RAGIN' PERVERT!
: O : O : D ; )
10. You spend a lot of your time talking to sex addicts and heavy masturbators.
9. You try to come up with your material while playing "guitar" for def chics.
8. You still think you are a participant in trials for Cialis.
7. You haven't figured out that you should schedule your late night gigs telling jokes to winos during your wife's "special time of the month" and GO HOME with wine on the other nights!
6. Dirty jokes suit the quality of audience in the clubs that will give you mic time.
5. When you said you really wanted to come up with a set you could do in front of your kids - you were LYING!
4. Your mother was an empathic and "generous" woman. (That's right, yo' mama!)
3. Your braille underwear is too tight.
2. You think: "If it was funny in middle school, it's funnier now."
Number 1 reason you can only come up with "dirty" jokes:
..................................................................................................
YOU ARE BASICALLY JUST A RAGIN' PERVERT!
: O : O : D ; )
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